EPISODE 2 — MINDING THE OPINIONS OF OTHERS

0:00 Chapter 2 Minding the Opinions of Others Nobody knows this, but when I opened my first salon, I would come home and cry a lot. I was very much a private person, so I never showed anyone what I was going through. I made it all about everybody else. However, deep down I was absolutely dying with worry that I just wasn't good enough to run a salon. I kept asking myself, how do I even do this? I've not got a business degree, what am I doing? From a very early age, I had a really strong work ethic, and I was super independent.

0:42 My aunt had once said to me, Follow your dreams, Carla, you only live once. She had written those heartfelt words to me from her hospital bed. She was sick with cancer at the time, and she was only 36 years old. A few days after she gave me that advice, she sadly died. At the time, I don't think I could really process it. She was a career-driven, ambitious woman. She had a daughter and a husband, and I was in awe and inspired by her. And it didn't seem fair that this could happen. So when I saw Salon available to rent on Warner Street in Accrington, I felt like I had sparks of fire in my belly.

1:25 Sheer passion, and I needed to do it. If I don't do it now, I could die tomorrow, and I thought I could work, I have the skills. What's the worst thing that could happen? That same day I rang my stepdad and I said, I've just seen a shop and I need it. Please just come and have a look with me. It was a two-story stone terrace building with plain cream walls and concrete floors. It was just a bare blank canvas, nothing at all inside. It was really cheeky, but my stepdad managed to blight me one month's free rent from the landlord.

2:03 I was so excited. I was like, this is amazing. My stepdad warned me, he said, right, here's six and a half grand for the deposit. You've got three months to make it work. My mum was not currently working, my real dad was a drug addict who I did love dearly. I had no choice but to make this work. Philly was not an option for me. I was ready. Thanks to the love and support of my family, I finally had the keys to my first salon and it felt amazing. My dreams could not have started without them. And this made me even more determined to succeed.

2:42 There I was finally a salon owner. I was only 21 years old, and I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Failure just wasn't an option. Managing imposter syndrome. Never feeling good enough has been one of my main driving forces. I was bullied pretty much throughout my entire school years. I used to be frightened to death of words that people would say. So I was always striving for perfection in everything I did. On the first day of opening my salon, I ended up working for 12 hours and I only had two customers.

3:18 The door said that I was open from 9am till 9 pm, so I had to do it. But there was a little voice inside my head saying, You're not good enough, Carla, you can do better. So I gritted my teeth and I was like, that's okay, two people, let's keep going. The next day followed, and the next day, and within three months I was booked up to the point that I needed help. It sounds so easy when I put it like that. All you have to do is the hard work and you'll magically get there. However, I want you to know there was lots of ups and downs on my journey.

3:54 I would get passive aggressive comments like, oh she just does nails. People would dismiss me by saying, What a beauty therapist, bimbo. I had all these comments and allowed a lot of negative messages into my head. On top of that, I had my own negative thoughts that came from inside me too, a place from fear and low self-esteem. At that time, I wanted to prove everyone wrong. I wanted to prove myself wrong. And I knew that I was good enough. But I had a real fear of failure. So when someone gave me negative feedback, I had no option but to make it better.

4:33 I would ask myself, why did they say that? And start looking for the answers. Did I really do something wrong? Was the service really that bad? It didn't occur to me to let something stop me. I saw it again as a sign that I had to do better. I was striving for perfection. Throughout my entire career, I've taken every negative comment that someone's given me and I've run with it. Don't get me wrong, it still hurts. I would still cry, but I used it to push me forward. I once got a negative review that said my treatment beds were just not warm enough.

5:09 I could have sat at home and been sad, or I could go out and get better treatment couches or put bedwarmers on, so I did. It was an experience I had to go through, and one that I want you to know didn't come easily. Every comment hurt, every bad word made me feel awful. But by using the negative feedback to your advantage, you can make anything better. You can make your business better or even yourself. I really care about people's opinions, and you might see it as a weakness. But turn it over and see it as a strength.

5:44 I used it to create excellence, and that's why I have award-winning salons. Don't let negative comments stop you from trying or from making the mistakes. It's part of the journey. And sometimes making those mistakes gives you so many funny stories along the way. I once needed to practice eyebrows, but I didn't feel comfortable waxing on a paying client. So I reached out to a friend and asked for help. She said, Yeah, sure, okay, if it's free. Well, I only went and waxed her entire eyebrow completely off.

6:17 It wasn't funny at the time, in fact we both actually cried. I'm never waxing eyebrows again, I said in horror. She had to go home with one eyebrow on, didn't she? I've done spray tans for people and forgotten to do their inner thighs because I was chatting away. It's probably not the best service I could have given them. But when you're learning and growing, these things are going to happen. It's normal. I've caught a couple of cuticles on people's fingernails and toenails, and there's been a little bit of blood present, and it looks bad.

6:51 But you can manage the process and make sure that the wound is cleaned and covered up. There's a process for everything, and that's part of the process. Just don't panic. If you mess up, honesty is the best policy. If you mess up, if someone critiques your business, hold your hands up and apologise. Clients will have so much more respect for you if you do. If you're having a bad day, or if a product didn't work as well as it should have done, or the customer just didn't feel valued. It's important that you reach out to your clients and ask for the feedback.

7:29 It's not the end of the world, and you'll find a way to make it better. Obviously, I really don't want to encourage you to think it's acceptable to go around making mistakes all the time, but these things do happen. We're not robots. We're not going to be perfect every day no matter how how hard you try. So don't be too hard on yourself. Find a way to make sure that you never make the same mistake again. And even if you do make the mistake again, it's not the end of the world. If I'd quit when I got things wrong, I wouldn't be where I am today with three amazing salons and a range of business awards with a professional dedicated team.

8:12 Your money mindset. When people first start running their business, whether it's self-employed or in a salon, they're often not aware about their money mindset. And I do think it's an important thing to consider. When I opened the first salon, never in my life have I ever seen that amount of money. And it wasn't a lot, but it was a lot to me at that time. I was a naive little girl and I didn't realise that the money you see and the money you don't see are two very different things. I was in awe of what I thought financial wealth really was.

8:51 I thought it was a big house, the fancy car, the Louis Vuittons, but I was just a kid with no financial education and no financial backup. Should anything go wrong, I ended up maxing out my mum's credit cards and spent£13,500 before I'd even open the salon. I took the approach of, yeah, I can do this. Let's not think about the consequences. I knew it was my priority to pay back my debts first, but in order for a business to grow, I had to change the way I thought about money. Lots of people have limiting beliefs about money, and I did too.

9:32 I believe that if you've got lots of money, you are a horrible person, you're selfish if you want to have lots of money, and all of that. But I want you to know that wanting and having money does not make you a bad person. It's what you do with the money that determines who you are. I bought myself all these amazing things, and rightly so, I put in the time and the efforts to create that wealth, and I work for it, but I always gave back to others along the way. If someone doesn't have the desire to work hard, they can't expect to have the money they want.

10:08 It creates resentment, and I think that's why people start judging others for financial success and where they get their negative messages around money from. People don't talk enough about money, especially women, so let's change that and open the conversation. I came from a background where money was tight, and I'm no longer ashamed to say that getting more money became one of my main drivers. For the first four years of running my business, I lived at home, and I knew I couldn't leave home until I had a sustainable income.

10:42 It was a turning point in my understanding, and I started thinking, okay, so I need to be paid this in order to get to that point. My staff need to be paid before I get paid. So I need to make X amount of money. But then the companies that provide my products need to get paid. And I've got rent on the salon. So really, this is how much money I need to be paid in order to get paid back myself. It sounds simple, but you'd be surprised how many people just don't think carefully about money like that.

11:18 It's that thought process that led me to come up with the policies and procedures that were needed to help me grow my company. It made me realise that I needed to learn more about money, about bookkeeping and profit and loss accounts. I began to understand why I'd see multi-million pound companies generate all this money but then have nothing left in the pot. And if you have nothing left in the pot, what is the point? Working on my mindset around money was an eye-opening experience, and I would recommend you also to work on yours.

11:55 When you understand how money works, you can invest in others and help people grow. And that's when you start using money for good. It can be a great source of happiness. And what's wrong with that? At this point in my life I understand about my money mindset, and while I actually earn less now, I am much more rich in how I spend my free time. I pay people to do the work I just don't have time to do because I want to spend more time with my family. It is through understanding money and my relationship and mindset around it that I've been able to do this.

12:37 How to approach your money will depend on what's important to you. Do you want more time? Do you want more money? Or do you want more self-development? Having a good money mindset is about how you make money. It's about what you use the money to achieve your goals. It's what you do with it on your journey, how you invest it and how you use it. To me, money is not success. It is just a byproduct. To some people, driving a nice car and living in a big house is not success. It's about spending their money on holidays and only working part-time so they can spend more time with the people that they love.

13:21 It's up to you, you decide what money is going to do for you. If you're unsure on how to start when it comes to money, here are a few basic rules. Give it back. If you do get the wealth, give it back. Every penny that I earned during the first six years of business, I invested back into the company rather than myself. I invested it in people, in education and skills. I might not have paid myself a wage for those first three years, but I was always investing in my education. Invest in your personal growth too.

13:59 Because even if you make lots of money, it will not fix your personal problems. It will just bring more, and trust me on that one. Learn about money. I always thought success was how big your turnover was. I was so naive. I was striving for my turnovers to be bigger and bigger and bigger. I genuinely thought that everything that went into the till was mine. I was like, God, business is so easy. But as my turnover got bigger and bigger, my profit margins became lower and lower. On the outside, I looked like I was making more and more money.

14:40 But actually, my net profit margins became so much smaller. I didn't understand where the money was going. It was tough. Honestly, I never had a clue about what all this meant. And I had to learn whilst I was doing. Like I said, I'm not an academic person, so I had to really focus hard. But investing in my education around money has helped me grow my business in so many ways, and it will help you too. Pay back your debts. The money that I had used to open my salon wasn't mine, it was a loan. And I knew how hard money was to come by.

15:19 And it was important to me to pay back every penny. You will always be living in the past with your debts, so make it your number one priority to pay it back. Then you can focus on your future profits and what you're going to do with them to grow professionally and personally. Put your business first. Being the last person in the business to get paid made me learn different ways to manage money. It made me work even harder to drive the company forward because if I wanted to pay myself, I had to get my company in a good place.

15:59 You could say it was quite a naive approach to business. However, by making one of my key drivers ensuring that everyone else was cared for, it pushed me in the right direction. I had to make sure that all my product providers were paid to date. And I had to make sure my team were paid before me. After all, without a team, you haven't got a business. I just didn't realise how it all worked. I didn't even know what profit margins were in my services. I just delivered a service and hoped for the best.

16:35 It's kind of like doing business backwards. It's all figure out, Abel. Slowly over time, I realised, wow, I can do this. I can do anything I put my mind to. But I wish I'd known that I didn't have to come home and do it alone. I didn't have to come home and cry alone. I didn't have to put on my brave face when people said horrible things. And I should have asked for help when I was struggling, but I didn't know I could. I didn't know what I didn't know. I didn't have a circle of friends who understood business or a community that could give me the answers.

17:17 I didn't have a business coach and I didn't have anyone I could talk to at that point. Google was my closest friend in business. If you don't know something and you feel out of your depth, don't be afraid to learn. It will be your biggest driver of success. And remember that those emotions that you're going to feel when you start are really normal. The fear, the worry, and the doubt, it's normal and it's okay to feel like that. You don't need to take things personally. But if your client has a criticism and it needs to be heard, that's what they value.

18:00 And it's a value that you can adapt and change with. It's a value you can ignore, it really is up to you. Core beauty tips number one, it's okay to make mistakes. It's like passing the first driving test. You're gonna hit bumps along the road, you're gonna have a couple of crashes. But it's about picking yourself back up and not being too hard on yourself. We all make mistakes. Number two, when trying something new, don't quit. Give it three goals at least. And that's when the magic starts to happen.

18:38 You need to action your new skills and you have to believe. Whether it's academic or a physical skill, you have to do something with something you've learned. Number three, keep asking for feedback. It keeps you on your toes. If you stop trying to learn and improve, your standards will slip, and that's not good for you or your business. Number four, keep the end goal in sight. It will be tough, especially when people judge you. But I had to remind myself constantly of the end goal. It will be worth it.

19:15 I would think it's kind of like your internal vision board. Just keep that vision, stay focused and remember why you're doing what you're doing. Number five, enjoy the journey. If you don't enjoy what you're doing, it will be so hard for you, and all those negative messages will get to you. You've got to enjoy what you're doing and know it'll be worth it.